how many Hogwarts students does it take to change a light-bulb?
1 Slytherin to break it
1 Gryffindor to volunteer to climb the ladder and change it
3 Hufflepuffs to hold the ladder and insure the safety of the Gryffindor student
and 1 Ravenclaw to point out that they could have just used magic
HOW DO PEOPLE FALL ASLEEP SO FAST I DON’T UNDERSTAND I HAVE TO CREATE AND ACT OUT A WHOLE FUCKING MOVIE LENGTH STORY IN MY HEAD AND THEN CONTEMPLATE THE MEANING OF LIFE BEFORE I EVEN FEEL TIRED AND THIS BITCH STARTS SNORING IN TWO MINUTES
one time my mom accidentally put wine into my little sister’s sippy cup and it was only discovered because when my sister asked for another cup she added “this juice is spicy”
*looks at Princess* Mmmhmm!
*holds up sippy cup*
"More of the spicy juice, pretty pleeaase?"
*innocent face*don’t do this here
my grandma used to put crown royal in ginger ale bottles to sneak it into the bowling alley and my mom accidentally put it in my sippy cup when I was two
I told her it tasted soapy and she didn’t believe me until i drank half the glass and drunk cried
i never run voluntarily so if u ever see me running you should start running too bc something is coming